Сообщений в теме: 260

[A700VHM]

Кто видел "АНИМАТРИЦА"??
В армане перед просмотром фильма показали, блииииииин я офигел... там такие спецэффекты, такая музыка, такая графика, все на высочайшем уровне!!! и все это удовольствие длится минут семь. Теперь еще силнее хочу посмотреть матрицу2!!!  

[bergoundi]

Кто видел "АНИМАТРИЦА"??

2 A700VHM
сразу видно, что первую страницу этого топика вы не читали  

[DarkhaN]

Кто видел "АНИМАТРИЦА"??

2 A700VHM
сразу видно, что первую страницу этого топика вы не читали  

точно.  
мне тоже понравился Аниматрикс. После просмотра появилось большее желание поити на Матрицу 2 !
а вчера трэйлер ещё посмотрел - кажется СУПЕР !
лишь бы не перенаворотили там...

[A700VHM]

Кто видел "АНИМАТРИЦА"??

2 A700VHM
сразу видно, что первую страницу этого топика вы не читали  

Блин, я сначала написал а потом прочел... хехе аж стыдно стало

[sipirgish_]

Кто видел "АНИМАТРИЦА"??
В армане перед просмотром фильма показали, блииииииин я офигел... там такие спецэффекты, такая музыка, такая графика, все на высочайшем уровне!!! и все это удовольствие длится минут семь. Теперь еще силнее хочу посмотреть матрицу2!!!  

если вы о том куске, к-рый показывают перед пунктом назначения2.. я тожа офигель в том месте кода он сказал... //лети, детка лети//...озвучка безобразная аднака..

[Cineman]

фильм ожидается неплохой, но я думаю не будет той шумихи, которую навела первая часть Матрицы.
хотя...кто знает !? :smoke:
на фильм пойду однозначно !
смотреть в кинотеатре, желательно домашнем :)

Что касается шумихи, то это будет самое настоящее поломничество в кинотеатры. Места придется бронировать заранее - "Властелину колец" и не снилось...

[Flashback]

я себе забронирую диван у себя дома...... ДВД forever!!!

[OmonRa]

я себе забронирую диван у себя дома...... ДВД forever!!!

а флаера будут?

[Rey]

Народ, у кого есть трейлер "Последний полёт Осириса" дайте плз!
Хоца ещё разок другой посмотреть...  

[A700VHM]

Народ, у кого есть трейлер "Последний полёт Осириса" дайте плз!
Хоца ещё разок другой посмотреть...  

Классная вещь да?

[Rey]

Народ, у кого есть трейлер "Последний полёт Осириса" дайте плз!
Хоца ещё разок другой посмотреть...  

Классная вещь да?

ну мне онравилось, довольно высокого уровня графика, да у девочки фигурка просто супер... в общем хороший мультик...  

[*****2g*****]

короче дело так, примьера будет около 20-го числа
сего месяца, фильмец как всегда закончится на самом
интересном и нам ничего не останется как только
ждать следующеё части , которая выйдет
гдето в отябре-ноябре,вобщем в конце осени...
декорации там будут суперские, они даже
участок дороги специально строили,
короче наберитесь терпенья и подождите чуточку.

[KA3AX]

7 дней осталосьььььь!!!!! Жду жду

[*****2g*****]

вот пара фоток
 ---------------
Имеджи убраны. Даю предупреждение. Будь милостив к народу, который просто повиснет, ожидая загрузки. Если картинка, то маленькая со ссылкой на большую.

[Salam]

кстати я не совсем понял из скриншотов, Нео же агентов мочил в сортире, легко. А тут он опять с ними машется. Типа его перегрузили с другими свойствами? ))

[Ameliya]

опять сплошная реклама
ducati...

[A700VHM]

опять сплошная реклама
ducati...

Не говори, щас фильмы оплачивают рекламодатели

[Cineman]

опять сплошная реклама:)
ducati... :rolleyes:

Не говори, щас фильмы оплачивают рекламодатели:)

Когда там какой-нибудь "КазКом" или "Тумар" появится?..

[Ameliya]

опять сплошная реклама
ducati...

Не говори, щас фильмы оплачивают рекламодатели

Когда там какой-нибудь "КазКом" или "Тумар" появится?..

[otaku]

THE MATRIX: REJECTED

A film franchise so sloppy, so irresponsible, so lowbrow
that it's almost criminal.
Here's 50 Reasons to stay away on May 15th.


by Dr. Albert Oxford, PhD



The Matrix Murders

The first film killed 13 students at Columbine High School, the disturbed trench-coated teens imitating the pipe-bombing, shotgunning film's finale. How many troubled teens are out there Reloading with the release of the sequel?

In fact, the only reason the U.S. Attorney General did not press murder charges against the filmmakers is because the movie was shot in Australia, giving it diplomatic immunity.


The aborted American dream

Warner Bros. devoted $300 million to the production of the two Matrix sequels.

In the time the films have been in production, over one thousand American children will have died of starvation. For the cost of these films, each of those children could have been given one million dollars.


I'm dreaming of a white... cast?

Two actors were abruptly cut from the sequel cast before production ended, both female minorities. Coincidence?

Aaliyah and Gloria Foster were unceremonially dropped after shooting some scenes for the sequel. What's wrong, guys? They didn't test well with the predominantly white Matrix audiences?

Neither actress could be reached for comment.


The Neverending Story

A spectacular car chase. The loss of a crucial figure in the human resistance named "the Keymaster." A withering assault on the refuge city of Zion by a boiling swarm of sentinel droids. Neo screaming, holding Trinity's burned corpse. And then, cut to black.

That's how The Matrix: Reloaded ends.

This isn't really one of the 50 reasons, but if I can drive just one person away from seeing this rubbish by giving out this information, I have done my job.

Enjoy your bloody film, yanks. To quote Neo, that's one spicy tamale.


The Neverending Story, 2

This aforementioned abrupt "cliffhanger" ending (aka, cheap sequel-selling stunt) seemed like a good idea... until parents groups filed an injunction blocking the release of part 3. Kind of eliminates any reason to see part 2, does it not?


Reloaded Ridiculousness

Think you're missing something special by staying home? Think again. Several times in the sequel Neo is seen flying at almost supersonic speeds. NASA experiments prove that such a velocity would tear a man's genitals off.


Bruce Willis was a ghost the whole time!

Can we please have just one major studio movie without a trick ending? I won't reveal it because some of you have requested that I not, but Reloaded has a shocking surprise near the end that the studio has bent over backwards (probably in slow-motion, while dodging bullets) to conceal. All I'll say is that it has to do with the surprise return of a certain treacherous character who we all thought was dead in the first film. Can any of you decipher what I'm saying here?


Reloaded Ridiculousness, 2

I'm not joking; you'll literally feel your I.Q. drop watching this rubbish. For instance, the evil Matrix creates two new enemies for Neo, called the Twins. Their first priority is to blend discreetly into the simulated world of the Matrix, to walk among the people unnoticed. So of course the Matrix made them huge albino men with bleach-white dreadlocks who occasionally transform into shrieking wraiths.

"What's that, honey?"

"Oh, nothing. It just looks like a simple Kung-Fu Swedish Rastafarian Helldemon. I'm sure there's no need to question our fragile, sheltered grasp of 'reality' as we know it."


The Matrix: Reconsidered

But the first film was great art, you say?

In the spoon-bending scene, watch closely. First we see Neo bend the spoon almost into a "U" shape... now watch carefully (freeze-frame it, for you DVD owners). A second later it's back to its normal shape again. Ironic that a film meant for no-attention-span kids also had a no-attention-span editor.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 2

After they sucked the "bug" out of Neo's abdomen, where was the gaping bloody hole the thing should have left? Even if Trinity had the medical training to re-tie the knot in his navel, we certainly didn't see her do it.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 3

In the same scene, the "bug" is casually discarded in the street. Better hope no one comes along and steps on the squirming, burrowing thing with their bare feet.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 4

You've worked as a policeman your whole life, protecting the innocent, enforcing the law. You retire with honors, then take a job as a security guard, working the metal detector on the ground floor of a skyscraper in order to help pay for your wife's arthritis medication. You're sitting there, on a slow day, reading your newspaper, when a girl walks in wearing a trenchcoat. She issues no demands, no warnings, no "freeze" or "drop your gun." She just tears you in half with a spray of machine-gun fire, then does cartwheels along the walls while killing all your friends.

Somewhere, faintly, you can hear a theater audience cheering.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 5

Neo can move faster than sound, yet can't move blindingly through bullet time and simply disarm the security guards rather than slaughtering them? It looks like Neo learned his disarming techniques from George W. Bush.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 6

Neo and his crew can generate an infinite number of guns in the construct, but can't come up with non-lethal weapons such as long-range tasers and sleeping gas?

Would not the "exciting" skyscraper shootout have been just as exciting if the two had been armed with the Vomit Sticks from Minority Report? Or are these lives not worth saving?


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 7

You are a hard-working single mother, making ends meet by doing time as a secretary in an office building during the day, a drug-store clerk in the evenings. You are on the office phone with the babysitter one quiet Wednesday afternoon, telling her how to calm little Dakota down, to get her to stop crying her eyes out asking why Mommy is never home, telling her that you'll be there soon, honey.

A split-second later your head is severed by a shattered helicopter rotor blade, the skull bouncing off a nearby wall, leaving a spray of arterial blood on a motivational poster. Your eyes bulge wide, your brain inside remaining alive just long enough to recognize the horror of your fate. Aviation fuel splashes in through the shattered windows and ignites, incinerating mothers, husbands, fathers, best friends.

And somewhere, a theater full of young, chubby males cheers because Trinity made it out before the crash.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 8

"If you wanna give me that juris-my-DICK-tion crap, you can kiss my ass."


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 9

You infiltrate a building to rescue a hostage who you can't afford to lose. Either his death, or your own death, would have unimaginable consequences for the entire living world. So, once you're inside and riding up the lift, it's a good idea to go ahead and set the building on fire by dropping a bomb on the first floor.


The Matrix: Reconsidered, 10

It's the film's climactic battle between Agent Smith and Neo. It begins with Agent Smith walking down the subway platform toward Neo. Neo's friends tell him to run. But no; he stands and fights.

They fight for what seems like an hour, back and forth, an epic battle of good and evil. Neo takes a beating, comes back, finds his courage, becomes The One. He goes toe-to-toe with the baddest of the bad. After this long, choreographed, pivotal moment of the film, Agent Smith is left...

...walking down the subway platform toward Neo. Neo's friends tell him to run.

He runs.

Excuse me, ticket lady? I'd like a refund of the last fifteen minutes of my life. It would be like if at the end of Rocky, after sitting through the whole film, the main character just lost the fight anyway.


Excuse me?

"I hate this place, this... zoo. It's the smelt."


By their fruits ye shall know them

I had attended a showing of The Matrix in May of 1999 with a lady friend, because we are both big Morgan Freeman fans. An hour into the film, as I observed what dreck we were wading in, I walked up and stood before the screen and tried to explain to the audience that this vomitus was below their dignity.

I was greeted by some of the most vulgar insults imaginable, until some began throwing objects and one man even knocked my pipe from my hand. Do you wish to be associated with a group of such character?


By their fruits ye shall know the staff, too

After the above incident, I was the one asked to leave.


The Matrix: Reconsidered further

If you need to get in touch with a person, you can simply call them at their office. You do not need to actually mail the phone to them.


Two words:

Keanu Reeves.


Two more words:

See above.


The Matrix: Reconsidered further, 2

The film states that the humans attached to the matrix were kept alive by liquifying the dead and feeding it to the living, apparently pouring the mixture into their containers in the form of strawberry Jello. Such a diet would not be sufficient to support an adult human.


The Matrix: Reconsidered further still

Bullets travel at over 900 feet per second. I don't care how fast Agent Smith and his friends pulled their triggers in that hallway, their bullets would not travel in a tight pack like that. It takes a tenth of a second for an automatic to recycle itself, meaning that by the time the second round left the barrel, the first bullet would be 90 feet away.

You should have heard my gales of laughter upon seeing this scene during my second viewing of the film. I fully expected the audience around me join in the derision, and when they did not I walked up and down each row, leaning over each seat and howling my gales of mockery right in their faces.

Once more, the staff removed me from the theater, rather than doing the proper thing and removing the film from the theater. Ridiculous.


The Gaytrix

Hollywood's homophobia never fails to astound me. First, I applauded the romance between the two male characters, Neo and Trinity. Then I found later that, because of demands by Keanu Reeves, Trinity was actually played by a woman in shorthair.

(If you look closely in certain scenes of the film, you can make out breasts.) Where were the protests?


By their fruits ye shall know them, 2

Average weight of the common Matrix fan: 276 lbs.

U.S. Census Bureau, 2001


By their fruits ye shall know them: Reloaded

Average I.Q. of the common Matrix fan: 91. That's fifteen points below average, folks.

U.S. Dept. of Education Statistics, 2002


By their fruits ye shall know them: Revolutions

We all know that, by financially supporting the Matrix franchise that killed those kids at Columbine, each and every Matrix ticket-buyer is literally an accomplice to murder. Are you one of them? The ten million-plus buyers of the DVD is without a doubt the most sickening conspiracy of murder since the Holocaust.


The death of choice

The humans of the future are attached to the Matrix, in embryo-like pods. They receive nourishment from the Matrix, they cannot survive independent of it. They share a blood stream, their consciousness is provided completely by the mother system.

Thus, the humans are part of the mother's body and the matrix can terminate them if it so chooses. The film's suggestion that this is evil is a direct assault on female choice and the fundamental functions of motherhood. Can female slavery be far behind?


Keanu Bin Ladin

The filmmakers have admitted that the computerized "Matrix" in the first film symbolizes American technological dominance over the Islamic oppressed peoples of the world (did you notice that the name of Saddam Hussein's three divisions of Republican Guard, the Nebuchadnezzar, Medina and Hammurabi, are also the three names of the hovercrafts in The Matrix? This is also why almost half of the human protagonists in the film are of Arabic descent).

Has Warner Bros. chosen Saddam as their hero? Is this why Neo was to be sporting a thick, dark mustache in the third film?


Keanu Bin Ladin, 2

Don't misunderstand the above item; like all of you, I wholeheartedly agree that America has been the most evil force of imperialism in world history. But should the third world be stirred to such violence as commanded by the Matrix films? Why could the film not portray Neo and Captain Morpheus peacefully demanding fairer trade policies and access to low-cost prescription drugs and vaccinations via the United Nations?


Keanu Bin Ladin, 3

Speaking of terrorism, could not a film as toxic to the minds of its audience such as this be labelled a Weapon of Mass Destruction? The number of Kurds Saddam Hussein poisoned with his nerve gas is miniscule when compared to the number of brains that have been poisoned by The Matrix. Where is the U.S. military in this situation?


Still not convinced the first film was rubbish?

The cybernetic army that took over the Earth, says the film, was solar powered. The human resistance responded by blotting out the sky.

A desperate measure, but surely the only choice they had. It was that, or, I don't know, postpone their counterattack until evening.


Huh? 2?

Jamming a huge needle in the back of someone's skull will kill them.


This is your brain...

Speaking of which, does no one else have the problem with the blatant pro-drug message in these films? The idea that you can be transported to a magical wonderland where you have supernatural powers simply by inserting a needle into your skull?

Is it any coincidence that "jacking" (injecting heroin directly into the brain using a nine-inch long skull needle) became all the rage with our teenagers after this film?


Hope you haven't just eaten...

And what was that white goo they were eating in the cafeteria? Would you eat something like that, having just seen it spill out of an apparent robot penis?


Grow up

The policeman in the opening scene of the first film? Look on the credits and you'll see he's billed as Lt. Geyser Shitdick.

Infantile.


Do try this at home

Interesting that the stunts on Jackass must carry a "do not attempt at home warning," but in Reloaded Trinity is shown smashing through a skyscraper plate glass window and shooting pistols into the sky as she plummets to the pavement below. Is this something you want your eight year-old doing? Where is the disclaimer?


And while we're on the subject...

With children everywhere attempting the first film's stunts, has Warner Bros. reimbursed the families for the Jello stains, torn trousers and bent flatware that resulted?


Excuse me? 2

"I'm only good for two things. Degreasing engines and killing brain cells."


There's a bug in the logic program!

Cypher, prior to his surprise return at the end of the second film, sells his friends out for a steak dinner. This makes sense, because, as he points out, aboard the ship all they have to eat is the "cold goop" grown in the ship's vats.

Of course, he could always get a steak in the ship's construct. He wouldn't be nourished by it, but it's the experience he wants. Or, they could all stop at an Outback Steakhouse during one of their many trips inside The Matrix.

Eh, betraying all of humanity to eternal enslavement was probably easier.


There's a bug in the logic program! 2

If they're so hungry for meat, why not just cannabalize some of the humans attached to the Matrix? Their lives mean nothing, anyway.


PVC problems

If you're going into physical combat, do not wear skin-tight black plastic clothes. The chafing will literally draw blood, as we saw when such uniforms were tried by the French Army.


Moooooooo

Am I wrong to say that, despite the criticism of myself and other members of the intellectual elite, that this film will still make obscene amounts of money in ticket sales? Hollywood knows how to push buttons, and it knows Matrix fans inside and out. These lowing cattle will lap up the multimillion dollar flash and fire just as beasts stand in the pasture and lap up their evening bowls of cow pudding.

Oh, yes, I think it is safe to say that once all you Matrix fanboys out there get a load of the blinding, hyperkinetic Reloaded climax, you'll walk out of the theater still very pale, fat and lonely.


Also consider...

Keanu Reeves.


Hacker heroes?

"He's been going for ten hours straight. He's a machine."

That's right. The first indication that Neo was The One was his ability to spend ten hours sitting in a chair. There's your hero, computer dorks! "Hey, check out the neuralkinetics between the chair and his arse!"


Hacker heroes? 2

Computer nerds are heroes? The good ones are listed among an elite, chosen few?

That's odd, because I mastered the complex code it took to format this web page in half an hour. I guess that means I'm The One!


Bullet holes, plot holes>>The character "Morpheusbrcellspan=22 colum=49 function resizeWinnewLoc, newHeight, newWidth) newWin = open("",newLoc,"scrollbars=no,resizable=no,status=no,height=" + newHeight + ",width=" + newWidth);
negroes are known for their(URLpopupWindow = window.openURL,"lobby",width=608,height=408,scrollbars=no,resize=no" if document.images) { begin --!> a1on = new Image() a1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer2_dl_mac_micro_ovr.gif'; b1on = new Image() b1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_mac_small_ov.gif'; c1on = new Image()
while his taut buttocksc1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_mac_med_ovr.gif'; d1on = new Image() d1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_mac_large_ovr.gif'; e1on = new Image() Bill and Tede1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer2_dl_mac_ultra_ovr.gif'; f1on = new Image() f1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer2_dl_pc_micro_ovr.gif'; g1on = new Image() g1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_pc_small_ovr.gif'; h1on = new Image() h1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_pc_med_ovr.gif'; i1on = new Image() i1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_pc_large_ovr.gif';
revive a person simply by talking to themj1on = new Image() j1on.src = '../rl_img/trailer2_dl_pc_ultra_ovr.gif'; aoff = new Image() aoff.src = '../rl_img/trailer2_dl_mac_micro.gif'; boff = new Image() boff.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_mac_small.gif'; coff = new Image() coff.src = '../rl_img/trailer_fnl_dl_mac_med.gif'; doff = new Image() doff.src = '../rl_img/trailer_

Но нас этим не купишь, мы все равно пойдем в кино